Secrets of a suicide
by H.L.Mittermair
Summary: Hermione returns to hogwarts in her seventh year. She's head girl, Malfoy is head boy. They have to share a common room. But does anyone know she cries herself to sleep each night, or that shes done it since her 3rd year? Not very good summary but complet
1. Chapter 1

Hermione lay in her room. Her life had seemed so perfect to everyone. She had come back from the summer holidays a young woman. Her curves had become curvier. Her hair straighter, darker. Her eyes deepened with the slight natural blush of her cheeks. She was beautiful. She had the attention of every male in the hall as she rushed in late from head girl duties. She was sharing a common room with head boy and school heartthrob Draco Malfoy She was smart. Best grades in the school. Perfect boyfriend, perfect life. She knew different. Abused at home. Empty feeling in the pit of her stomach that food couldn't fill. No one loved her. She was different. She was rejected. She was repulsive. She longed for her soul mate, her mùirn beatha dӑn. But no one wanted her. She was alone, her heart broken too many times. She was different now. She knew it. Why couldn't anyone else see it? She wanted to die.

_To the person who is reading this,_

_You won't care, no one will, but I am leaving a piece of me for the world to remember. I don't care anymore. I am alone, and I hate it this way. I have been crying out for help for years, but no one listens. Why do I even bother, when it always ends in tears? Why does everything I do, confirm my deepest fears? _

_My heart is torn and broken_

_My soul shattered, in a heap_

_My other half, yet to be found_

_Afraid, to take the leap_

_But if you know it's now too late_

_The girl once known has gone_

_In her place lies solitude_

_Loneliness has won._

_Have you read this far? Why haven't you given up? You don't care about me, no one does, I'm alone, I see, you're curious, well here's something to rest your curious mind: Good-bye._

Draco finished reading, and wiped away a tear. He watched them carry her body out of the castle. How could she not see how much she was loved, appreciated? He had loved her, and he had hidden it. Was it his fault that she was driven to kill her self? Stabbing herself repeatedly until the blackness came?

Draco couldn't stand it. It was too much. Was this how she had felt, before she took her own life, relieved, yet disappointed it had to end this way?

He took a deep breath, closed his eyes, and jumped, feeling a moment of relief before a flash of black, and then nothing.

A/N: this fanfic is not related to the 6th hp book. I am not depressed for those who might not be wondering, I just feel a little sad because I was thinking of my cat who I had had since I was born and who died on my birthday. But who knows, Draco and Hermione may really be feeling like this, j.k. seems to give us hints because DM and HG are really angry/scared all the time.

_elle: thankyou SO much for your review, I really appreciate it_

_Blackadder: of course there are Hermione fics posted on this site already, because this is FANFIC we are using characters already in existence, but we are STILL original because we are putting our own perspectives or characters into the story, as well as our own plots. And as for Voldemort, some authors wrote their stories, or had the idea befor the 6th book came out, some choose to IGNORE Voldemort because he is not necessary to their plot, or some (like me) put A/N's at the bottome, if you care to read them, that it's not related to the 6th book, AND not the mention the fact that my fanfic is the feelings of Hermione and Draco, ENTIRELY, that means no one else has any importance._

_AND my characters aren't OOC because for all we know, because J.K. doesn't really give us peeks into any characters heads except maybe Harry's, they really could feel like that. Think about it! And it wasn't a try, it was a success, but really, thanks for your review._

_Stravagante: Thanks for your review, its nice to know that people appreciate some of the things I do._

_Blackrose Kitsune: Thanks heaps. I really like good reviews, btw, of course you can use my poem, I'm just actually surprised that someone likes my poetry._


	2. Chapter 2

Dumbledore entered the room to find two letters on the table. One opened, the other sealed. He sighed deeply and read the open one first. It was Hermione's. But this other one, who's was that? With trembling hands Dumbledore fingered the seal, before opening the letter.

_I loved her, more than life itself, more than Potter or Weasley ever could have, I saw the sadness in her eyes. How her two friends could look her in the eye and not see past her façade, I cannot describe my disgust. She hated me, I could not save her. But she loved Potter and Weasley, they could have made a difference, if they had bothered to ask her why she never laughed, never showed emotion anymore, why she walked with her head down, arms crossed and feet shuffling. Why didn't anyone help her? I tried, oh god how I tried, and I failed. I cannot live with myself for failing her, when she has never failed me. How did people not notice the bruises covering her petite body? It doesn't matter anymore. Have you read Romeo and Juliet? Maybe you have, but be content to know that she will be happy where she is, and I will keep an eye on her, as she always did for me in the first year. I can't take the pain anymore, the ache deep in my heart telling me I failed her, telling me to make it up to her, somehow. But I do know that she doesn't want that bastard at her funeral, the bastard that beat her and took her innocence. It was her only wish, she prayed it every night, I heard her. "Lord, please let me die, and when you do, leave him to suffer with the guilt, keep him locked up, and then send him on his way to hell where he rightfully belongs". Please keep her wish, whoever reads this, please don't let Blaise Zabini anywhere near her funeral. Together in death, at last._

_Draco Malfoy, who is in love with Hermione Granger._


End file.
